Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

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Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Mon Oct 05, 2009 2:31 pm

Conservapedia Bible Project.

Yeah, take your Bible back! Jesus wasn't a peace-loving commie!!

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by TPaine on Mon Oct 05, 2009 5:04 pm

Celsus wrote:Conservapedia Bible Project.

Yeah, take your Bible back! Jesus wasn't a peace-loving commie!!
But Dald, you can't go by those modern pinko translations. You have to follow the 1611 Authorized Version that was written centuries before modern archaeological discoveries such as the Dead Sea Scrolls, the Nag Hammadi Library, and many ancient Greek manuscripts. By following the KJV you can continue find ultimate truths such as the concept of the Trinity. Erasmus' first addition of his Greek New Testament (1516) followed all existent Greek manuscripts and did not include the Trinity concept which only existed in the Latin translations. The church "suggested" that he correct his "error" which he did in his second addition which was what the translators who wrote the KJV used as their source.
1 John 5:7-8 (King James Version)

7For there are three that bear record in heaven, the Father, the Word, and the Holy Ghost: and these three are one.
8And there are three that bear witness in earth, the Spirit, and the water, and the blood: and these three agree in one. (Bible Gateway)
1 John 5:7-8 (New International Version)

7For there are three that testify: 8the[a] Spirit, the water and the blood; and the three are in agreement.

Footnotes:

1. 1 John 5:8 Late manuscripts of the Vulgate testify in heaven: the Father, the Word and the Holy Spirit, and these three are one. 8 And there are three that testify on earth: the (not found in any Greek manuscript before the sixteenth century)(Bible Gateway)
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by sacrificialgoddess on Mon Oct 05, 2009 8:10 pm

I thought that this was the only true Bible!


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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by MaineCaptain on Mon Oct 05, 2009 8:49 pm

SG looks right to me

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by jumbojava on Tue Oct 06, 2009 11:10 am

All bibles just need to be discarded. Except for Lolbible.

Srsly.
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by jumbojava on Tue Oct 06, 2009 11:21 am




Rev 4:6 WTF! A angel sez 2 evryone, "Oh hai, I haz ur gospell!"7 "U scrued, iz judjmentt timez now. U wershippz Ceiling Cat or else. Kthxbai."


So sez Ceiling Cat!!!
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by TPaine on Tue Oct 06, 2009 11:57 am

jumbojava wrote:


So sez Ceiling Cat!!!

You'll need a lot more:


responds Basement Cat
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by allthegoodnamesweretaken on Tue Oct 06, 2009 1:38 pm

Does anyone else find it hilarious that they included: "Not dumbed down" In their list?
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by DotNotInOz on Tue Oct 06, 2009 2:02 pm

allthegoodnamesweretaken wrote:Does anyone else find it hilarious that they included: "Not dumbed down" In their list?

Not all that humorous considering that I've read portions of the Good News translation which is without a doubt dumbed down to sheer idiocy.
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by MaineCaptain on Tue Oct 06, 2009 4:05 pm

allthegoodnamesweretaken wrote:Does anyone else find it hilarious that they included: "Not dumbed down" In their list?
I know I did, I found it truly bizarre since they have been doing that themselves for years

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by allthegoodnamesweretaken on Tue Oct 06, 2009 4:12 pm

My question is, if it's not dumbed down, will any of them be able to understand it?

Wink

I guess that kind of goes without saying. I don't think the ones preaching understand it now.

all
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Wed Oct 07, 2009 12:25 pm

Ah, this is getting better and better!!! Smile

Their version:

Jesus asked the Liberals, "Which is lawful on the Sabbath: doing good or evil? Saving a life, or killing one?" The Liberals did not answer. Mark 2:4

The Liberals then fled from the scene to plot with Herod's people against Jesus, and plan how they might destroy him. Mark 2:6

Jesus perceived immediately what the intellectual types were thinking, and he asked them, "Why are you so hostile to this? Mark 2:8


source

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Wed Oct 07, 2009 12:26 pm

allthegoodnamesweretaken wrote:My question is, if it's not dumbed down, will any of them be able to understand it?

Wink

I guess that kind of goes without saying. I don't think the ones preaching understand it now.

all

Yeah, the people involved seem to be VERY ignorant. But I guess they like tea parties Wink

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by TPaine on Thu Oct 08, 2009 3:13 pm

They should consider doing it in a form Sarah Palin would understand, a comic book, or perhaps those You Tube links Dald posted in another thread.
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by TigersEyeDowsing on Thu Oct 08, 2009 4:10 pm

Haha. I can't figure out if this is a parody (like the lolcat bible) or something for real.

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Thu Oct 08, 2009 4:16 pm

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:Haha. I can't figure out if this is a parody (like the lolcat bible) or something for real.

It is for real! It's a Conservapedia project and they're fo realz.

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Thu Oct 08, 2009 4:16 pm

TPaine wrote:They should consider doing it in a form Sarah Palin would understand, a comic book, or perhaps those You Tube links Dald posted in another thread.

But those Youtube links aren't too flattering for BibleGod Wink

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by TigersEyeDowsing on Thu Oct 08, 2009 5:06 pm

As a kid, I greatly enjoyed The Living Bible, which was hugely huge in America (40 million copies sold).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Living_Bible

"In 1972 and 1973, The Living Bible was the best-selling book in America." I liked it partly because it was different, partly because my first one was a gift, and partly because it annoyed the piss out of my hardcore-nigger-jew-andeverybodyelse-hatin'-fundy-churchmembers.

I was so bad to push their buttons, when they demanded the King James.

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by TPaine on Thu Oct 08, 2009 5:08 pm

I know, Dald, but can the fundies figure that out?
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Fri Oct 09, 2009 10:51 am

TPaine wrote:I know, Dald, but can the fundies figure that out?

Hm, probably not ...

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Sakhaiva on Fri Oct 09, 2009 1:37 pm

Reading the comments on huffingtonpost.... this one made me laugh:

"Bible re-writes with no ancient dead language skills!? " http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/05/conservative-bible-projec_n_310037.html

How silly is that.


Looking at this from another perspective, the latest trendy attempt to *update* the Bible is -- to me -- just another way to ho a buck. Take something old, repackage to seem *relevant* (read: marketable) and voila!

I need to get on the band wagon as there seems to be cash to be had; perhaps I should renew sensibilities by seeking to publish the "Jane Austen" Bible. Not only would it use the more formal Regency era language, it would also cross reference various passages to Ms. Austen's books.

Plus it would have a very pretty cover.
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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Fri Oct 09, 2009 1:50 pm

Sakhaiva wrote:Reading the comments on huffingtonpost.... this one made me laugh:

"Bible re-writes with no ancient dead language skills!? " http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/05/conservative-bible-projec_n_310037.html

How silly is that.


Looking at this from another perspective, the latest trendy attempt to *update* the Bible is -- to me -- just another way to ho a buck. Take something old, repackage to seem *relevant* (read: marketable) and voila!

I need to get on the band wagon as there seems to be cash to be had; perhaps I should renew sensibilities by seeking to publish the "Jane Austen" Bible. Not only would it use the more formal Regency era language, it would also cross reference various passages to Ms. Austen's books.

Plus it would have a very pretty cover.

The people working at this are utter nutjobs.

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by sacrificialgoddess on Fri Oct 09, 2009 7:17 pm

Cel, have you read the latest Austin?

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies! It is hiliarious! And actually fairly well written.


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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by Daldianus on Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:34 am

sacrificialgoddess wrote:Cel, have you read the latest Austin?

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies! It is hiliarious! And actually fairly well written.


No, I haven't. Sounds cool though!

The aim of that author differs greatly though from what the nutjobs are trying to do ...

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Re: Help BibleGod to write the one and only true Bible!

Post by DotNotInOz on Sat Oct 10, 2009 6:11 am

I may have to read that if I can get beyond that yuck-inducing cover illustration. EEEWWW!

Please tell me it's better than The Eyre Affair, et. al. which I could NOT get into despite everyone's assurances that someone with my background (former English teacher) would adore it.
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